I feel that my blog readers, whether it’s one person or 300 people, deserve to know a little bit more about me and the rocky road. I’ve been holding this one in for too long and have finally mustered up enough courage to write about a few personal experiences… good or bad, it is what it is.

Quick note: I’ve been playing basketball, on and off, for roughly ten years. I also abused marijuana (among other substances) a little over 4 years of my entire life. It was essentially throughout the ‘high’ school years.

In today’s society, weed-smoking isn’t looked upon as terribly corrupt. Come to think of it, who didn’t toke a chubby blunt every now and then? I know I abused it to the point where I couldn’t even get through a single day without craving a few draws.. My ganga-smoking habits eventually became ridiculous. I began to do anything and everything…stoned. From eating junk-food, to playing Halo 1, to writing an English exam. And till this day I believed I’ve yet to meet one person who never puffed a joint, until I got a phone call from an old high-school buddy (she knows who he is and I appreciate her) a few weeks back and remembered that some people do stay away from drugs completely. And to my amusement, we talked about drugs, very typical of her as she was the one person that always tried to steer my drug habits in to the soberest of directions. Hence, that conversation is precisely what enthused this post. Sure some can argue that THC kills your brain cells, that it absolutely thieves one’s ambition, and is ultimately bad for your health in a number of ways. From hygiene to mental sharpness, many believe smoking Marijuana is bluntly no good. Despite all I’ve been through, I’m not here to lecture y’all on your ganja-smoking rights, for the logical reason being that I would be a hypocrite if doing so. Even though I haven’t frazzled myself in centuries it seems, but still, it doesn’t give me the right to pass judgment. What I am willing to concentrate on, is the potential upside and advantages of weed-smoking if one goes about it intelligently. Everyone knows what THC represents and its causes. The main effects for the classic stoner are enhanced sound and vision, ability to find everything funny, and a powerful desire to eat at a rate equivalent to the appetite of a dinosaur. One other effect that many tend to overlook is the originality and inventiveness it provides for the artistic. Furthermore, not all people smoke weed only to become buzzed or even to have a heavenly meal, some indeed strive to take advantage of the artistic qualities it provides in order to develop their crafts. First and foremost, people notice rocks stars, bands, rappers, free-stylers, beat-makers, singers, and generally musicians, that exploit drugs for self-improvement. However, the arty tools of Ganja can be used in a variety of fields. Whether it’s freestyle-ing behind a local hang out, or getting high before you enter a club knowing your best moves won’t surface unless you’re ripped, or even smoking a pinner just before a Halo tourney, knowing your game face isn’t complete without two ruby eyes. For me, years and years of weed-smoking preceding basketball… absolutely transformed my game.

Let’s take a stroll down memory lane. Anyone who has known me since babyhood, also knows that, as a kid, I was the emperor of soccer fields all across Scarborough. As years passed, the game of basketball became more fashionable in my neighborhood (Malvern, aka: the ghetto); it also began to appeal to me and my core group of elementary associates. Then one sun-born day my Baba and I constructed an eight foot, hand-made basketball net in our handsome backyard, and that was the day my life changed forever. Accordingly, as you might expect, I began to acclimatize to the culture neighboring me, and these were the initial stages where my transition began from one sport to another. From the age of 11 to 15, I knew nothing accept for basketball. I even remember watching Jordan hit that series-clinching dagger against the Jazz. What a voyage it was, and still is…

I thoroughly remember, (which is astonishing to me as the amount of marijuana I’ve consumed over the years is unbounded), the times and basic grounds where I first began to experiment and combine the two major facets of life that were taking over mine: Marijuana & Basketball. I was one of those kids where when I smoked-up..it was like someone rapped thick tape over my mouth, leaving me wordless. I was a very smart boy, but if intellect were to be tested on having an oral discussion on the major causes of WW1, to communicate the reasons of King Caesar’s downfall, or even to express how to find x or y…you could count me out, because I was always stoned, in my own world, thinking about or doing nasty with the basketball. Anti-social would perfectly illustrate the effects of marijuana on me. I always did wonder why it handicapped me communicatively …So, at the age of 15, I did myself some research and learned how marijuana has diverse effects designed for different people. And in my particular case, the only way to truly enjoy stoning was, if during my intoxication, I was involved in activities that entail creativity; for example: sport, video games, or painting. I sure as hell wasn’t fascinated by Picassos, and Nintendo certainly passed its climatic influence, and the rest was history…a wholehearted combatant was born. His name is Peja..or so they called me.

From approximately grades ten to twelve, everyday following last period…we would have some incredible jam (ball) sessions a few blocks down McLevin…I remember in most cases, some of us would tend to a little sesh just before tip off. (perhaps I should say shoot for ball, ha-ha) It was my mind that usually flew the furthest away. I literally spent years playing basketball blazed, but not high out of my mind, I still could control a ball-game and lift my team upon my shoulders to win. It sounds bizarre, but as long as you have a significant amount of water close by for the dried out throat, all is good. Now, I am not sure exactly why my skill level rose so rapidly. But I do indeed have a hunch on how things worked. I believe since I was habitually short of words, my mentality had to rely on a different form of expression. Thus, all the words trapped in my gullet, and in my mind, that yearned to burst out, converted in to my athletic-ability. So, in a sense, I spoke through and with the basketball.

Gradually, I began to see the whole lot more clearly. I learned what certain things meant. For example, the value of a pick or screen, how to defend more effectively by simply moving sideways quicker, to box out which results in a rebound and ultimately another possession. An understanding of Basketball was growing inside me among a few other qualities: a will, a passion, a refusal to be beaten. I remember competing for money at times but nothing crazy. Ten bones here, ten bones there. Then after mastering the basic fundamentals, the next level awaited. Essentially, a creative outlet had been built inside my body frame. My intellect and wits began to present itself on the steet-court. I discovered how to hop step, cross-over, leap higher, drive quicker. Artistically, my passes were becoming mouth-watering, I could drain a shot in the most toughest of situations, sometimes even with a contested arm down my throat reaching for my heart. Because that is what makes an amazing player.. his/her heart. The organ that can pump lively blood in to your body, or take your life away in a split-second. I was always a talented player because of my speed but was never ambitioned for organized sport. That is something I’ll never know as I never tried. Although, ironically, I was forced by my peers to play on the high-school soccer team, which blowed because at that time, I was fascinated with basketball and only basketball. A handful of friends did question why I never tried out for the high school basketball team…I would usually respond foolishly as if no one had time for practice, or no one would rise at 6 am to be at practice by 7. Besides, I was always out grabbing a deagle, or blazing a blunt somewhere with some other potheads. Through it all, I am ready to test my ability with school approaching ever so close.

With the few benefits of drugs, come heaps of towering, dream-halting walls, that overpower you no matter the level of your strength. Long story short: I was falling fast and hard by the time I graduated from high school. It became extremely worrisome when I stopped doing what l loved the most, my ultimate passion, my long-time creative outlet… Basketball. Then came a day that I truly believe God chose to throw me a bone. He introduced me to a special someone that came in to my life, and changed everything I ever believed in. She essentially reminded me of what was important and how I was moving further and further away from it. And apparently that meant I couldn’t love her, let alone love myself. After many dramatic episodes, and I mean many, she came to me, with a basketball in her hands, and said, “your falling..you’re not doing what you love any more..we’re done, etc” I knew I couldn’t live without her at that time, so I listened. I’ll never forget those words. Basketball, among other sports, began to take over my life once again, and everything else fell in place beautifully. And till date, that was the wisest choice I ever made: to listen. Time has passed and she’s gone now, but I’ll be forever greatful. I believe it was that exact day that God wanted my eyelids to mount.  Most people today wouldn’t classify Marijuana as a drug, but for me, it was ten times worse, it was a fucking desire-thieving, hope-demolishing, life-threatening DRUG. That drug has been out of my system for quite some time now and I owe everything to that instant, those words, and that basketball…

Sport is the reason I’m a specialist. It’s is the reason my thighs are as thick as tree-trunks. It’s the reason why I see all with a crystal clear attitude and frame of mind. Basketball inspired many other avenues and doors to be opened for me. Sport is the reason I’m sitting here by the fire, thinking of clever words to string as one. If it weren’t for basketball, I’d be lost. Sure I walked down a path to self-destruction, but I’m still here, this mighty heart still thumps, these hazel eyes still perceive, and this voice is much more potent than ever before. All this and the ability to dazzle magnificently with the ball in my reach. I accept as true that no regrets stick to this soul.. a soul made of layer upon layer of indestructible strength. I want to thank Allah/God for testing my soul abundantly..time and time again, and for giving me strength to move forward and dream like never before.